


So I Tiptoe

by itjustkindahappened



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: High School AU, M/M, Marcel!Harry, Popular!Louis, also harry is called harry but he looks like marcel, and niall doesn't really care and just supports whatever happens, el and tay are annoying, harry stutters when he's nervous, i still don't know what to tag, idk it's just easier that way, larry stylinson - Freeform, liam is that friend who is always right, louis cares a bit too much about what people think, so i'll just keep talking rubbish, sry girls, zayn is the cool best friend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-10
Updated: 2013-11-10
Packaged: 2018-01-01 02:46:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1039428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itjustkindahappened/pseuds/itjustkindahappened
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry is kind of a dork and Louis is kind of an asshole, and Louis swears this is not going to be like High School Musical, but. Then that stupid pool party happens.</p>
            </blockquote>





	So I Tiptoe

**Author's Note:**

> so I guess I'll just upload the two one shots I already have on my tumblr, just to have something here. this was from when everyone was into marcel/louis in all kinds of ways, and yeah. it was inspired by one of those pool party imagine pics on twitter.  
> also I might should mention, english is not my first language, so if there's any mistakes, I apologize.  
> title is from tip toe by this century.
> 
> this is translated into [italian](http://www.efpfanfic.net/viewstory.php?sid=2897977&i) :)
> 
> (by the way my tumblr is a-bit-extraordilarry.tumblr.com)  
> (please follow me there)  
> (*shameless self promoting*)

Louis is not shallow.

He really isn’t. Sure, he’s popular, and sure, he might care about what people think about him a tad too much, and well, it’s not his fault that he’s hot and he knows it, but. That doesn’t make him shallow. He reckons he’s a pretty decent and non-judgemental guy, actually.

But when Harry Styles, a boy who basically is the ultimate stereotype of a typical _nerd_ , stands in front of him, nervously pulling his collar and pushing his huge glasses farther up on his nose, he really can’t help it.

Harry just looks so many different kinds of ridiculous, and Louis is the popular golden boy (like, not to brag, but really), and this is not High School Musical, so why is Harry even trying to go near with him?

"H-hi, Louis," he stutters, and Louis can’t help but roll his eyes a bit.

"Hi, Harry," he says, trying to sound as unintrested and bored as possible.

"I, um, I was just wondering- I Heard you’re having a pool party this weekend?"

"Uh, yeah, why?"

"I just- Can I like, can I come?"

And Louis almost chokes on his own saliva, because _like just interacting with the guy wasn’t enough already?_

This is not High School Musical, he thinks again. To be honest, he’d always had more of a Mean Girls kind of attitude to school.

"Um, no offence Harry, but you’re not really… The right type to invite to a pool party."

"I know, but I just thought…"

"Thought what?"

"I thought… Uh, nevermind. I get it. I’m sorry I bothered you, I didn’t- I’ll just leave now. Sorry."

Harry turns around, and Louis feels a strange lump in his stomach. He bites his lips as he watches the tall boy’s slouching figure and frowns when he realizes that what he feels is _guilt_. He curses lowly, because really, who is Harry Styles to make _him_ feel bad?

"Harry, wait!" he calls before he can change his mind.

Harry turns around so fast it’s almost comical, and asks “What?”

"Two p.m, my house. You know where that is, right?"

Harry nods almost excessively. “Yeah, I think so.”

"Good. Just- just look nice, yeah?"

And Harry lights up at that like Louis just had told him that he won the lottery.

"I promise, Lou, don’t worry," he beams, before heading off to his next class.

This is not going to be High School Musical, Louis thinks one last time, and shakes his head.

~

Louis is sitting in the cafeteria with his friends surrounding him. It’s that table everyone glances at in awe, or jealousy. Everyone know who they are. Himself, along with guys like Liam Payne, Zayn Malik and Niall Horan is always acknowledged by girls all over the place, and girls like Eleanor Calder, Hannah Walker and Taylor Swift always turns every boy’s head in the hallways.

Louis likes them, though. They’re nice and witty and funny, and he loves hanging out with them.

Well, most of the time. Right now, they look like he just had dropped a bomb on them.

"Are you serious, Lou?" Zayn asks for the fourth time. "Harry _Styles_?”

"It’s not like I want him there," Louis snaps. "He just made me feel bad, okay? I did say no at first, but then he looked fucking _heartbroken_ , so I just… Invited him.”

Zayn stares at him like he can’t believe Louis is real. “You’re actually serious.”

"Harry might be nice. Maybe you should give him a chance?" Liam suggests, thoughtfully chewing another bite of his toast.

Louis shakes his head. “You’re too nice, Li. It doesn’t work that way. I won’t talk to him at the party anyway, we just don’t go together.”

"And why is that?"

"Have you ever looked at the guy? He’s like taken from a bad high school movie. It suprises me he doesn’t have braces, too. Let him go to my party if he so desperately wants to, but _I_ won’t make sure he has a good time. _He_ wanted to come.”

Liam sighs.

"Why am I even friends with you?" he mutters.

~

Louis’ backyard is crowded.

There are people everywhere. Girls in skimpy bikinis, guys with tanned, bare chests, the people who are “too cool to care” and sit inside with a drink, and the people who actually bath in the pool. Balls and towels fly everywhere and empty beer cans cover the ground. It wouldn’t suprise Louis if his whole year is here.

Well. Except Harry. He’s not here yet.

Louis is looking for him, which is silly, because he doesn’t really care whether he comes or not. But still. If the boy wanted to come, why doesn’t he?

"Is Harry not here yet?"

Louis looks to his right, to see a grinning Niall standing next to him. He huffs.

"I just don’t understand. _He_ asked _me_ if he could come. So…”

He stops talking when he sees Niall staring at something behind him. “Wha-“

Niall just grabs his shoulder to turn him around and- wow.

Louis’ eyes fall on a boy at the other side of the pool. A boy with a head of lucious, brown curls that leaves Louis with an itch to run his fingers though them. A pair of RayBan’s cover his eyes, his collarbones are _out of this world_ and oh my God, he has tattoos. Louis lets his eyes wander from the small ones scattered out on his left arm, to the delicious swallows on his chest, to the butterfly on his stomach which should look _ridiculous_ , but it doesn’t, and. If he’s imagining licking that butterfly, down to his abs and to his happy trail, then that’s his own buisness and nothing others have to know.

"Wh- who is that?" he stammers, and Niall laughs.

"I think that’s Harry Styles, mate."

Louis eyes widen. _Excuse me?_

"It’s not."

"It is."

"But…" Louis tries. "He doesn’t look like that."

"Louis, you’re throwing a _pool party_. Did you honestly expect him to show up in one of those grandpa vests?”

To be honest, Louis kind of _had_ thought that. Or, maybe not. He honestly doesn’t know what he expected.

But it certainly wasn’t this.

"Uh, excuse me, I just have to- y’know. Welcome our guest."

Niall just grins. “Whatever you say, Lou.”

Louis doesn’t even care about his friend’s mocking tone, just elbows himself through the sea of people. Soon, he’s next to Harry and he actually looks even better up-close. Louis thinks he might be losing his mind.

"Harry?" he asks hesitantly, watching the boy turn to his.

"Oh," he says and bites his lip. "Hi, Louis."

"He has very nice lips, Louis notices. Dark pink and full, a bit paler where he bit down with his white teeth. They really are very nice.

"Um… Is there something on my face?" Harry asks, raising a hand to uncertainly scratch his chin.

Louis blinks. “What?”

"I just thought- you were staring."

"Oh." Louis shakes his head. "No, no, it’s just… You look good."

Harry’s cheeks flushes red and he looks down with a small smile and _fuck_ , who gave him the right to have dimples? How had Louis not noticed that before?

"So… You have tattoos?" he asks and mentally slaps himself because _duh, obviously.”_

"Uh, yeah," Harry nods, "I just kind of like them, you know? Just to have small things I care about with me wherever I go."

Other people had started to notice Harry now. Eyeing him, impressed, or just completely starstruck. Louis could hear the girls talking.

"Is that Harry Styles?"

"It can’t be."

"It is! Oh my god, I didn’t know he was that gorgeous."

"Why is he hiding all of that?"

"Do you think he would go on a date with me?"

"He’s so hot."

Harry also notices the people’s stares, and shakes his chocolate brown fringe to cover his face.

"People are looking," he mumbles.

"You look good," Louis repeats. "People aren’t really used to see you like this."

"Jeez, thanks, Louis." Harry looks down on his feet again and Louis wants to throw himself off a cliff.

"No, I mean. Without the hairgel and the vests," he tries.

Harry is just about to answer, when Zayn comes up to them and grabs Louis’ arm.

"Lou, c’mon, you gotta see this- Oh. Harry?"

Harry runs a hand through his curls. “Hi?”

"Uh, hi. You. Look different?"

Harry laughs a little. “Good different or bad different?”

"Good, definitely. Mind if I steal Lou away for a while?"

"Oh, no, not at all- Just, I- go ahead."

So Zayn pulls him away by his arm. Louis can already see a blonde girl walking up to him.

~

The party is over, the last few people are gone, it’s twilight and it’s quiet, and Louis’ house and backyard is on a whole new fucking level of messiness.

He sighs so deeply and for so long he runs out of air, and then he half-heartedly starts to pick up cans and plastic cups.

"Do you need help?"

Louis yelps and jumps so high he’s surprised he didn’t hit his head in the ceiling, and turns around.

It’s Harry standing there, drawing invisible patterns with his toe on the floor. Of course it’s him. Just make Louis feel even more stupid for judging him for his looks before, just. Throw it in his face.

"I’m sorry, I just… It’s pretty messy here," Harry explains and Louis just looks at him like " _you don’t say_?”

"So… Do you want help?"

"You really don’t have to, Harry."

"Oh." Harry frowns. "You know, I’m not accusing you of anything, but like, if you don’t want me here you can just say so. I’m… Pretty used to rejection."

Really, Louis doesn’t know what it is with this boy that makes him feel so… _Guilty_. He just, he looks like a sad puppy sometimes without even realizing it, and it does things to Louis’ conscience.

"No," he says quickly. "I want you to help, but you don’t have to. You probably have better things to do."

"Nah. If I had better things to do I wouldn’t have asked, right? I’ll help you."

"Okay."

They just clean up in silence for a while, until Louis opens his mouth again.

"So… Why the new look?"

Harry shrugs. “Well, it’s a pool party. So doing my hair would be pretty pointless. Same with the glasses.”

"So you’re telling me those curls are natural?"

Harry nods. “They make me look ridiculous, but it’s not like I had any say in it.”

"They make you look cute."

"Well, I don’t want to be cute! Cute is like, kittens and small children. Not… Me."

"It still makes you look cute."

"I look like I’m twelve."

"Cute."

"They’re always messy and it looks like I just got out of bed."

"That’s just even cuter."

"No, it’s not!"

"It totally is."

"It’s totally not."

"Well, it really worked today, didn’t it?" Louis smirks. "How did you like the attention?"

Another shrug and a faint blush. “It was kind of weird. I’m not really used to it, you know?”

"Yeah… Why do you dress like… You usually do, though?" Louis asks. "I mean, if you dressed like everyone else, no one would pick on you. You would be popular, even. Get a pretty girlfriend. Or boyfriend, whatever floats your boat."

"I’m just going to pretend that you didn’t just offend my clothing choices," Harry started, and Louis groaned.

"I really should think before I speak, shouldn’t I? I don’t mean like that, I just…"

"Yeah, I get it. Isn’t it kind of shallow, though?" Harry continues. "That I apparently could get the dream high school time, just because I changed my style? I’m fine with how I dress, and I’d rather have no friends for being who I am than having lots of friends for being who I’m not."

Harry is really brave, Louis realizes. He doesn’t care about what people think about him. He’s brave enough to be himself in a world where that could be considered wrong if ‘yourself’ isn’t like everyone else, or better than everyone else.

"This world is twisted," Louis declares. "But at least I’d like to think _my_ friends aren’t there because I look good.”

"Uh-huh, I’ll just leave you to think that," Harry smirks and _okay_ , Louis isn’t going to pretend that Harry Styles smirking is not the sexiest thing he’s ever seen.

"Are you trying to say something, Styles?" he answers, struggling to keep a straight face himself.

"Well, you’re not the most charming person I’ve met."

"Excuse you? I’m the most charming person you’ll ever meet in your life."

"That’s pretty rich coming from someone who rejected my request about coming to the party you invited our whole year to, probably later said yes out of pity, and also succeeded to subtly offend me thrice during the three somewhat conversations we’ve had."

"Shut up, I’m brilliant," Louis mutters and throws a plastic cup at the curly boy’s head.

"Hey! Ass," Harry laughs. "Apart from what I’ve heard, my grades are ‘brilliant’ and yours are not, which means I’m smarter than you, so be careful with the confidence."

"I’m not dumb just because my grades are low, I just have better things to do. At least I have other things to do in my spare time than figuring out the square root of the highest prime number for _fun_.”

"So I like math, sue me. And by the way," Harry says, still with that stupid smirk on his face, "that wouldn’t be possible, since prime is infinite."

Louis groans loudly. “You are _such_ a dork.”

"Yep," Harry agrees, "and you’re kind of an asshole."

"Then so be it."

Another silence fills the space between them, but it’s a comfortable silence. Louis kind of likes it. And he kind of figures that he likes Harry. The cheeky, calm, easy Harry. Funny Harry. Nice Harry. Not the stuttering, awkward, serious Harry he thought he would be.

This time, Harry breaks the silence.

"Hey, Lou?"

 _HecalledmeLouhecalledmeLouhecalledmeLouhecalledmeLou._ "Mhm?"

"I’m glad you changed your mind and you know, let me come."

And Louis smiled, warm and genuine at that.

"Me, too."

~

Monday is here. It’s lunchtime, Louis is sitting with his friends at their normal table. It’s a normal day, really. Except that Louis is tired, and kind of in a bad mood, and he really hates Mondays.

His friends is discussing something he doesn’t really pay attention to, when he feels a light tap on his shoulder.

He turns around to ask the person to fuck off, but stops when he sees it’s Harry standing behind him, eyes green so green and a crooked smile on his lips. The first thing Louis notices is that once you find Harry attractive, you apparently can’t really seem to stop.

The second thing is that he’s wearing his normal clothes. The glasses, the hair, the pants, the buttoned shirt, and also one of those goddamn _vests_.

He’s not less beautiful, not at all, but he can already feel some of his friend’s judgemental stares, and he feels uncomfortable. He feels uncomfortable, because he’s popular and Harry is the nerdy loner and not the kind of person Louis should be seen with, after all.

"Hi, Lou," Harry smiles, not noticing Harry’s inner crisis.

Louis tries to push away that little flutter in his chest he feels when Harry uses his nickname. “Uh, hi, Harry,” he says hesitantly, gazing at his friends, who are now curiously watching him.

The taller boy seems to see that something’s wrong this time, smile fading slowly.

"I- I was just- I was wondering…" he starts. Firstly, Louis notices that Harry stutters when he’s nervous, which is actually really _cute_. But secondly, Louis subtly turns to Zayn next to him and rolls his eyes, and straight after he does it, he wants to hit himself with something hard, because _wrong_ , and he’s acting like the biggest douche ever.

And just to make everything worse, Harry notices.

"If… Sorry, you know what, could we talk alone, please?"

"Why would that be necessary?" Louis asks quickly.

Harry just looks at him pleadingly. “Louis. Please.”

Louis shrugs, stands up, gives his friends and apologetic look and says “I’ll be right back, guys,” before following Harry out of the cafeteria.

They stop in a somewhat empty hallway. Harry looks him dead in the eye. “Louis. What are you doing?”

Louis looks down on his feet. “What do you mean?”

"You know what I mean. Is something wrong?"

"No, nothing," Louis assures him, subtly looking around to be sure no one sees them together. Yes, he is a jerk. He knows. He just really can’t help it.

That little gesture, though, seems to make Harry understand what this is about.

"You’re ashamed of being seen with me," he states, lowly and his disappointed tone almost breaks Louis.

"What? No!" he protests, while the guilt rises more and more, heavy in his chest.

"Yes you are. I’m not blind."

"It doesn’t matter, whatever, what did you want?" Louis asks, in a pathetic try to escape the conversation.

Harry looks a him disapprovingly. “Of course it matters. Why, Louis?”

And Louis cringes, because now Harry is all sulking figure and frowns, but just a few minutes ago he had been shiny smiles and bright eyes and “Lou”, and it’s Louis’ fault he didn’t stay that way.

"It’s just…" he tries, but he can’t finish without sounding like a total douchebag (which he is, he figures, but), and he just hates himself more and more by the minute.

"Just? Just what?"

"I don’t know."

"You don’t know," Harry repeats slowly, and Louis notices the bitter tone in his deep voice.

"Harry…"

"You seemed just fine with talking to me yesterday. You didn’t mind people seeing us then. What changed?"

Louis doesn’t think. He’s just too pressed and frustrated and _heavy_ , and the words just fall out without his permission.

"Yesterday you didn’t look like this."

A dark silence follows after that.

Harry just stares. His eyes are glassy behind those big glasses and his mouth just kind of drops and Louis desperately wants to take it back, unsay the words, but he can’t, and it’s too late, and. And he just stands there.

One day, Louis would learn how to kick himself in the balls, and then he’d do that every five minutes for the rest of his life to make up for this painful conversation.

"You… Are _such_ a fucking _asshole_ ,” Harry breathes, and Louis’ mind screams “ _I know, I know, I’m sorry_ ”, but he’s quiet.

"You… You talked to me yesterday because I _looked good_? Because I looked like your little group of popular kids? And now you’re ashamed of being seen with me because I dress like _me_ again?” Harry continues, voice sharp and edgy and so cold.

Louis doesn’t say anything.

"That’s just messed up, Louis. That’s so fucking messed up. I can’t believe I actually thought you wanted to be my friend."

"I do want to be your friend," Louis helplessly defends himself. "I never lied about anything I told you."

"Oh, really? And what kind of friendship did you have in mind? Be friends as long as no one’s watching? As long as no one knows that you’re associated with the lonely, asocial nerd? I’ve… I’ve wasted so much time on you. So much time, for _nothing_.”

"What are you even talking about?"

“ _I’ve had a raging crush on you since 3rd grade, Louis Tomlinson.”_

Oh. _Oh_.

Just. He. Oh.

Suddenly every answer Louis’d had in mind disappears. He just opens and closes his mouth several times, like a gold fish.

"You have a crush on _me_?” he whispers.

Harry laughs bitterly. “How would that ever be a surprise? Everyone has a crush on you, and you _know_ it. No one’s just good enough for you.”

Louis swallows. “I- That’s not true.”

"It is and you know that, too.

”I’m not shallow. I’m not.”

"Oh, please," Harry says, voice shaking now. "Don’t you think I noticed how you looked at me when I talked to you the first time? Like I was disgusting. Contagious or something."

"I didn-"

"Yes, you did. And then at the party, we actually _talked_ and we _joked_ and I thought that maybe, maybe, I had a chance. To just- I don’t know. Be your friend. Because that would’ve been enough. But I didn’t have a chance. Didn’t, don’t, won’t. Because I dress differently and like learning, and because _you_ are too _shallow_ and afraid of what people will think.”

"I-" Louis begins, tries to find something to defend himself with. "I react like everyone at this school would. Why put everything on me when everyone would do the same thing? I’m just like everyone else here."

Oh my _God_ , can’t someone just come and take him away or something? Or duct tape his mouth. That would be good, too.

Tears prickle Harry’s eyes and he smiles sadly. “Yeah. You’re just like everyone else. But, you see, I thought you were special.”

And with those words, Harry turns around, lifts his glasses to dry his eyes with the back of his hand, and hurries away without a second look at Louis.

Louis just stands there for several more minutes, until Harry’s tall, lanky figure is long gone.

His chest is even heavier.

~

His friends are surprised at the least when Louis sits down at their table with eyes rimmed red and puffy cheeks, quiet and not meeting anyone’s worried looks.

"Are you okay, Lou?" Liam asks carefully.

Louis nods.

Liam exchanges looks with Zayn and Niall. Like hell he is okay.

"Are you lying to us, Lou?" Zayn asked.

A short pause, and then Louis nods again.

"Does this this have anything to do with Harry?"

Louis just nods helplessly and looks up at his best friend.

Zayn looks at him, but not judging or laughing. More… Understanding. Comforting. Even if Louis just has admitted to crying about the biggest nerd in school.

"Can we please not talk about this right now?" he mumbles, and Zayn nods.

"Of course."

Louis nods too, relieved. Zayn is actually great sometimes.

"We’re talking about this after school," he stated lowly, and looks to Niall and Liam, who also nods.

Or maybe he’s not.

Louis huffs and glares at Zayn quickly, before taking a deep breath and smiling at the other people at the table.

"So. What have you been talking about?"

~

"Okay, Louis William Tomlinson. We’re your best friends. We’ve been your best friends since forever. We don’t appreciate you keeping things from us. You tell us right now, what’s going on between you and Harry Styles."

"Zayn…" Louis whines, dragging his fingers along the grass. He doesn’t want this. He doesn’t want to sit here under a tree behind the school building with his three friends staring intensely at him. He doesn’t want to pour all his feelings and thoughts out. He does not _want to_.

"No. No," Zayn interrupts. "You’re not getting out of this one."

Louis sighs deeply. Right. Alrighty then.

"I really can’t help it, guys. He just, at the party, and he looked _good_ , and. He helped me clean up afterwards, _willingly_ , and he was nice and, and funny, and. I don’t even know.”

Liam scoots closer to him. “You know we’d never judge you, right? It’s okay that you like him or whatever. We’re still your friends.”

Louis is kind of touched at those words. Like, yeah. Of course he knows they’d support him. In the end, he knows that. But. It’s still really nice to hear. Because he also knows there are so many people who wouldn’t.

"Yeah," Niall chimes in. "S’ not like we blame you either. Everyone was a bit surprised, you know. Everyone talked about him. Looked like some male model you’d find in a magazine or something. And I'm sorry Lou, but you were gone as soon as you laid eyes on him. It was obvious."

Louis elbows Niall’s side, but Niall just grins.

"Well, it doesn’t matter anyway." Louis sighs after a while. "I’ve gone and fucked it all up before it even had a chance to begin. It’s all over."

And it might be stupid and silly, but he feels the tears coming closer again. He just really wanted it to work with Harry, after thinking about it. After the fight. He had first then realized how much he actually wants Harry in his life.

"Louis. What did you do?"

Louis nervously fiddles with his hands.

"Well… I just… I got scared, I guess," he begins. "And I… Kind of pushed him away. Because, well. He…"

"He…?" Liam pushes, and Louis has a feeling he already knows what Louis is trying to say. Damn Liam.

"He… He’s not like the people I usually hang out with? He’s just known as the nerdy loner, the human punching bag with straight A’s. And I was afraid of…"

"…Of people judging you?" Zayn finishes, and Louis just nods.

"I feel horrible. And I just couldn’t stop myself, and then he got to know why I acted weird. And I think I really hurt him."

"No shit," Niall mutters "I saw him on my way to chem class. He looks about just as devastated as you do."

Louis groans and covers his eyes. “Liam. Could you please kick me somewhere? In the shin. Balls, preferably.”

"You know what, if you didn’t already feel bad, I would’ve."

"I haven’t even told you the best part yet," Louis mutters. "He told me he’s had a crush on me since 3rd grade. And… I tried to defend myself. So I said something about that I reacted just like everyone else at this school would’ve reacted, and he said… He said ‘yeah. You’re just like everyone else. But, you see, I thought you were special’."

He got two elbows in his side at once at that.

“ _Louis_ ,” Zayn exclaims.

"Oh my _God_ ,” Liam groans.

"I know, guys! I know. I fucked up," Louis says, voice breaking at the last word.

"Am I the only one believing that he could like, fix all this again?" Niall finally speaks.

Silence for a moment. Then, “yes,” Louis says. “You are.”

"Okay, Louis, here’s the thing. If you could just prove to him that you’re sorry and not ashamed of him, he’d probably forgive you. I’m just sayin’," Niall shrugs.

"But that’s so _High School Musical_ ,” Louis whines. “The popular jock gets the quiet nerd by showing everyone that he can do what he likes and doesn’t give a flying fuck about what everyone else thinks.”

"Yes, so?" Liam questions. "It’s totally romantic."

"Yeah. And totally cheesy, too. And totally unrealistic."

"And it could totally happen."

"Guys," Louis tries. "It’s not like everyone will just give me standing ovations, congratulate me, accept me and move on. People will talk. And stare. And I could lose my reputation. Completely."

"Yes, yes you could," Zayn agrees. "But hopefully, you’ll have Harry, and you’ll always have us. You’ll still be on the football team, they can’t afford losing you."

"Yeah, but… People can say some cruel stuff, mate."

"And so can you. Defend yourself, last time I checked you didn’t have a problem with witty comebacks."

"Huh. So am I just going to walk up to him during class and start singing _Start of something new_ , then, or what’s the plan?” Louis mutters, and Liam elbows him again.

"Don’t be silly."

"No," Niall agrees, "you should go for _Breaking Free._ You know, got to go with the classics.”

"I literally hate you so much, Niall."

Niall laughs, and Zayn clears his throat. “ _Anyways…_ No, you’re not serenading him. But try talking to him first, yeah? Just talk. Explain. And tell him that he’s amazing just the way he is, you’ve finally found yourself, you’re not afraid anymore, he’s your one and only, etc, etc. You don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with, of course. But you really want this, don’t you?”

Louis nods.

"Well, then you should at least try," Zayn states. "And you also need to stop asking yourself what people will think. The real question is, how much do you care?"

And yeah, Louis really loves his friends.

~

Days passes.

Louis admits it; he’s actually really fucking scared. Because he’s never had to do this before, ever. This whole pining thing is just not something he usually does, and neither is apologizing, or begging.

And when it comes to rejection, he doesn’t even know if he can _handle_ it.

And that’s the scary thing. Harry could easily reject him. Because Harry isn’t like anyone Louis has ever liked, boy or girl. Harry is _real_. He doesn’t have a  façade to put up, he doesn’t ever feel the need to try being something he’s not, even if that made him friendless and lonely.

It’s not like Louis is proud of taking the time he does. He’s not proud of the accusing glances he gets from Niall, Zayn or Liam, or of the way they always discreetly nod or point in Harry’s direction as soon as he’s around them. And neither is he very proud when he crashes into Harry in the hallway one day, and he’s so close, and he can see every shade of green in his eyes behind the glasses, and he has the words right there at the tip of his tongue.

And instead he looks away and brushes past him without saying a single word.

No, he’s not proud. And after that he feels like such a disgusting human being, because he had seen the small spark of hope in Harry’s face, and he had seen it slowly fade as he didn’t say anything, so he has a small breakdown in the boy’s bathroom afterwards. And he pretends he doesn’t see the pitying glances Zayn, Liam and Niall exchanges when he once again comes to them with glassy eyes and puffy cheeks. They don’t blame him, though. Just comforts him. Louis doesn’t know if that makes him feel better or worse. Because they probably should yell at him. They really should.

So here they are again, in the school cafeteria, and Louis is sitting at the table with all his other popular friends, throwing longing glances at the lonely boy at the empty table in the corner, when no one is watching.

Except that something is different today. Louis throws one single glance at him, and yes, something is indeed very, very different today.

_ Harry  _ is different. He doesn’t look like he usually does. Gone are the vests and the hairgel. 

Harry is dressed in a t-shirt and a pair of washed out jeans. Some of the tattoos are peeking out under the sleeve, and his hair is curly and wonderful and pushed back under a beanie. The glasses are still there, but. They kind of really fit him. 

He looks really, really hot.

He looks normal, too. Casual. 

And so not _Harry_.

"What are you looking at, Lou?"

Louis winces and snaps out of his stare when he hears Eleanor’s voice. “Nothing.”

Eleanor narrows her eyes suspiciously and tries to find what Louis had been looking at. When her eyes fall at Harry, they widen and her jaw drops.

"Is that…? Louis, is that Harry Styles?" she wonders.

Taylor’s (who is sitting next to Eleanor) head snapped up, and her face mimicked Eleanor’s when her eyes also fell on the curly boy in the corner.

"Damn, when did he get hot?"

"Well, Lou’s pool party…"

"Yeah, but like. Do you think he’s going to permanently stick to this style this time?"

"I really hope so."

"Do you think he’d date me?"

Louis’ eyes narrowed at that question and he looked coldly at the blonde. “What happened to Conor, Taylor?”

Taylor rolled her eyes. “That was ages ago, Lou.”

"Honestly, I don’t think he’d date you," Louis shrugs and takes a nonchalant sip of his water.

"What, why?" 

Louis almost smirks when he hears the offended tone in Taylor’s voice, but manages to keep a straight face. “Dunno, you just wouldn’t fit together.”

Taylor frowns, and Louis can hear Niall coughing to cover up his laugh next to him. 

"Did I ask for your opinion or something?"

"You did ask if we think he’d date you. I just gave you my honest opinion. There’s lots of guys that would date you, Tay, but Harry’s not one of them."

"And why isn’t he?"

"Because Harry knows the difference between what’s shallow people and genuine people."

Honestly, Louis doesn’t even know were it came from, and he might have pulled out his most sassiest side, but he’s proud that he said it. Because it’s true, is the thing. Harry does see the difference.

And that’s why Louis never really stood a chance.

"Are you calling me shallow?" 

Another shrug.

"Well, you’ve been ignoring and laughing at him your entire school time, and now when he all of sudden is society’s definition of hot, you want him. So yeah. I guess I did call you shallow."

"Like you have the right to talk, little Mr. ‘Me-and-Styles-just-don’t-go-together’," Eleanor chimes in and puts an arm around Taylor. "Lou is just an ass. I bet he’s jealous or something. I think you’d be a lovely couple," she assures her and Taylor smiles.

And Louis sits quietly, because Eleanor is right. He feels Zayn rubbing his shoulder in comfort, and he gives him a halfhearted smile.

"You’ll talk to him today, yeah?" Niall murmurs.

Louis nods. 

He will talk to him today. He will.

~

Louis hurries through the school halls, making his way to Harry’s locker. He had pushed away all the second thoughts. He is talking to Harry today. Because, if this is style of his is going to be permanent, maybe he’ll be too late soon. And that would be harder to handle than rejection, to be honest.

He makes it to Harry’s locker, but stops dead in his tracks a few meters away. Someone got there before him. A very certain someone with blonde, curly hair and a very sweet, but seductive smile. 

Harry is standing with his hands in his pockets, smiling uncertainly. 

Louis does not like this. He does not approve. 

It’s not like he’s jealous. God no. He just really doesn’t like the thought of Taylor and Harry together. He deserves better, is all.

Without even knowing what he’s doing, he walks up to them, somehow determined to get Taylor away from his Harry. Or. Harry. Just Harry. Harry wasn’t his. He needed Taylor to go away from Harry.

He shakes his head quickly before passing them slowly, asking “making new friends, Taylor?”, knowing Taylor would try to defend herself.

He’s right.

Taylor narrows her eyes and glares at Louis. “Excuse me?”

He turns around slowly, with a sheep smile on his face. “You’re excused.”

Taylor looks utterly offended already, and it’s hilarious. “What the hell is your problem?”

"Me? Don’t really have one. But you might should be a bit more observant to see if people actually _want_ to talk to you or not before displeasuring them with your company.”

"I can’t _believe_ you,” she exclaims, giving him one of her sharpest glares. Louis just smirks nonchalantly, knowing it’ll probably drive her crazy. 

It does. “You’re just so _full of yourself._ ”

"Says the girl who can never imagine a boy _not_ wanting her clinging to him. You’re obviously making the poor boy uncomfortable.”

"I’m _not_. I’m just friendly, which is more than I could say about you.”

"Oh, please. I’m actually surprised you haven’t tried hitting on me yet."

"Louis, you’re _gay._ ”

"So am I, actually," Harry finally speaks.

All three of them is quiet after that. Harry looking apologetically at Taylor, who stares at Harry, and Louis is fighting to hold back laughter.

"Excuse me?" Taylor says after a while.

"I’m gay. Sorry. I’m sure you’re a lovely person."

Taylor looks between the two boys several times before asking “Is this rigged? Are you serious right now?”

"Look at it from the bright side," Louis smirks. "I’m pretty sure Conor’s still free."

Taylor’s jaw is dropped, and she hisses out a few cursewords before storming away.

When Louis is done giggling, he looks up at Harry, who already looks at him with big, emerald eyes.

Suddenly, Louis becomes insecure again. All the confidence he’d just had just disappeared when their eyes met, and he looks down at his feet. 

But he can’t just walk away this time, can he? 

No, he can’t. And he won’t. Really.

It’s just that he has no idea how to start

"So…" he starts slowly. "Why the…"

"…New look?" Harry interrupts. "It’s nothing permanent, if you’re wondering. I overslept and didn’t have time to fix myself. Is there no other way for you to start a conversation or something?"

Okay. This is not going to be as easy as Louis had dared to hope it might would. Harry’s eyes are cold, his lips pressed together in a line.

"Right. I just, I wanted to talk to you? And, you know. Apologize for being an ass."

Harry smiles, but Louis sees the hint of bitterness in his face. “Really?” 

"Y- yeah. I mean, I was stupid, and ridiculous, and. And I was really mean. And I know I ruined things, but I’d really like to fix them. If you know, if you’d let me. And I’m sorry. Really. I’m so, so sorry."

Harry nods, but his face is still a bit bitter, and a bit disbelieving, and Louis feels his heart slowly sink to his stomach. 

The tall boy leans closer to him, and Louis looks down, not sure what to do with himself.

"Really?" he says again, and Louis swallows, and nods. 

"Yes."

"Hm. Why don’t you tell me that tomorrow when I don’t look like everyone else at this goddamn school again, yeah?"

And Louis inhales sharply because _that’s just really not fair_ , but Harry is already walking when he’s opening his mouth to answer him.

~

Louis is just a mix between angry and grumpy and sad the rest of the day, and it’s a hell, really. He just snaps at everyone who tries talking to him and he avoids everyone’s curious glances, and he sits quiet in classes. 

"Hey? Lou?" Niall asks in English class.

"What?" Louis says, a bit harsher than needed, probably, but well. 

"Did you talk to Harry?"

"Yes, Niall, I did."

"… And it didn’t work or something?"  

"No, Niall. It didn’t quite work out." 

"What did he say, then?"

Louis sighs deeply. “I poured my heart to out to him, and he just went ‘say it again tomorrow when I don’t look like everyone else’ and I. He’s so unfair. I have been preparing and grieving for that moment for _weeks_ and then he just shuts me down like that.”

Niall is just about to mutter some sarcastic answer, but the teacher is first with a “boys in the back, is there something you’d like to share with the class?”

Louis thinks that teachers really need some variation on their snarky comments.

They don’t talk more about it that lesson.

~

When Louis and Liam enters the school cafeteria the day after, Harry is already sitting in his corner, just like all their friends are sitting at their normal table.

Harry looks like Harry again. His hair is slicked back and the vest is on. 

It’s kind of a relief, Louis thinks.

He and Liam grabs their food and sits down at their table. Louis quickly sneaks another glance at Harry, promising himself it was the last time. For now.

His plan doesn’t work.

The absolute first thing Louis catches of the conversation, is the goddamn name Harry Styles.

It’s Eleanor and Taylor. Of course.

"What a pity. He’s back,” Eleanor says, and Taylor snorts.

”Wasn’t very much to have anyways. Just saying, I talked to him yesterday.”

Louis’ irritation starts to grow, and he really can’t help himself.

”Seriously, Taylor? You just don’t like him because he blew you off,” he points out.

”Do not,” Taylor huffs, ”he just wasn’t interesting.”

”Nope,” Louis agrees, ”and he wasn’t straight either. Sucks for you.”

”Oh my god, Louis, why don’t you just go and snog him right now if you all of sudden like him so much,” Eleanor spits, and Louis isn’t going to lie, he’s about ready to do that.

Harry still hasn’t looked at him. Louis wishes he would. Then he would have caught his eyes, making him understand that he wasn’t ignoring him. That they would talk later.

But he’s looking at absolutely everything _except_ Louis now, Louis can feel it, and it makes him really frustrated. He clenches his fists tightly.

”Yeah, maybe I should,” he replies coldly.

Eleanor’s eyes widens. ”Really? I was just… You… Lou, do you _like_ him?”

Whoop-di-doo. The cat is out of the bag. Louis would probably be nervous, if he wasn’t already filled with enough displeasurable feelings.

So he shrugs. “Maybe.”

“Lou, what the hell? Where did this come from?”

“I don’t know.”

And then. Then Harry happens.

Harry looks at him. Their eyes lock, blue meeting green, and Louis doesn’t even hear Eleanor’s response.

Louis’ jaw drops, and Harry just stares.

And then Harry drops his gaze and continues eating.

Just like nothing happened.

Before Louis even had had the chance to do something.

“Lou? Lou!” Eleanor calls on him, but Louis doesn’t even care anymore. By now, he’s actually fuming.

This has got to end. Right fucking now, it’s got to end.

“Excuse me,” he mutters, before raising from his chair and walking over to Harry’s table with determined steps, politely pushing people out of his way before finally stopping in front of the boy, crossing his arms over his chest.

Harry doesn’t look up directly. After a few seconds, though, he slowly raises his head, frowns confusedly when he sees the shorter boy glaring at him.

“Uhm, hi Louis?” he mumbles, letting the greeting turn into a question.

If Louis wasn’t clenching both jaw and fists right now, he’d probably react on how cute that was.

Now, however, he just narrows his eyes a bit more.

“And what the hell do you think you’re doing?” he asks, and Harry flinches a little.

“Uh. I’m eating, if I’m not mistaken.”

“Stop that. I’m mad at you right now, and I will be until I don’t want to anymore, so let’s not pretend we both don’t know what this is about.”

Harry stares at him. “I really don’t know, though. Care to explain?”

Louis just opens and closes his mouth a few times, shaping unfinished sentences in his head. “You-you’re just so fucking _unfair_ , do you know that? Because at first you were just- just _no one_ , no one special to me, and my life was perfectly fine, and then you had to ask me about that stupid pool party, and you had to make me feel bad, and you just _had_ to make me _feel_ something, didn’t you?”

Harry opens his mouth to argue, but Louis stops him.

“No. No talking. I’m not finished. And then, you arrive at the party, and you look _good_ , and then you’re still so insecure, and so nice, and so, so lovely, and you’re not supposed to be like that! You’re not supposed to be so bloody nice, or funny, or just so _comfortable_ to be around, and. And you made me really confused, because High School is not supposed to be like that, is it? It has it’s groups and unwritten rules, and this was not supposed to work.

And you’re brave, too, Harry. You’re so brave, and you’re proud of yourself, and I’m not. I’m not proud of myself. I’d like to think I am, but in the end we all know that I’m an ignorant, superficial douche, and I just, it’s important for me to feel liked, and I always end up trying to hard for everyone to like me, because then maybe I don’t have to like me or whatever. And we shouldn’t go together. We really shouldn’t.”

Harry was quiet for a few seconds, taking in what Louis just had said. “I’m still not really sure where you want to come with this. Are you coming here just to yell at me, or do you actually want something?”

Louis is one tiny little bit from tearing his hair off of his head. He’s so close.

“You really don’t get it, do you? I’m standing here in front of you right now. I excused myself from the table _over there_ , where they are probably staring like crazy right now, and this cafeteria is _full_ of judging people who is capable of _ruining my life_ at literally any moment, just because I’m not sticking to my usual crowd, and _I’m still standing here_. You told me yesterday that I should come back today and tell you again, so here I fucking am, Harry, because I care, and somehow you manage to be perfect even if you dress like my grandpa and uses too much hair gel, and I really, really like you. So I’m sorry, I really am.”

None of them says anything. Harry just stares, eyes so wide and ever so green, mouth bitten red and open. Louis’ breath is heavy, and the anger is slowly fading away, and now he just doesn’t know what to expect.

But Harry doesn’t seem to answer, so Louis tries one last time. “Harry. I have just poured my heart out to you. I’m feeling very vulnerable and naked, and if you were to turn me down right now, I’d probably be so humiliated I’d fake being sick every school day for the rest of my life, so could you please just like, kiss me already and get over with it?”

Harry slowly stands up, never taking his eyes off of Louis, moving closer to him.

God, he’s so much taller than Louis. He should hate it.

He doesn’t.

Harry just shakes his head to himself first. Studying Louis’ blue eyes and flushed cheeks.

“Such an asshole,” he breathes, and then his lips are on Louis’, and. And. And.

Louis can barely understand it’s actually happening. He’s actually kissing Harry Styles in the school cafeteria. He should be absolutely terrified.

And maybe he is. But Harry’s lips are soft and full and sweet against his, and he decides he can save the thinking for later.

He closes his eyes and locks his arms around Harry’s neck. He almost has to stand on his tip toes to even _reach_ , and Harry’s tongue sweeps across his lower lip, hands moving down, settling on his hips, and it’s amazing, really. Better than everyone he’s ever kissed in his life. Harry is amazing.

When they break the kiss, it’s because they’re out of breath.

Harry’s lips are red and wet and shiny, his cheeks are red and eyes are glassy.

It’s a look Louis likes on Harry, he decides. Especially when he’s the one causing it.

He looks over Louis’ shoulder quickly and smiles. “People are staring.”

Louis shrugs. “I know. Probably whispering, too.”

“Probably. They will probably do for a while.”

“Yup. You know, it’s funny how I don’t give a flying fuck.”

“Yep. You should.”

“I really should.”

They’re quiet for a moment. It’s no uncomfortable silence, though. Just smiles and loving gazes.

“Lou! Over here!”

Louis snaps out of his gaze and looks behind him.

It’s Zayn, Liam and Niall. Of course. Of course it’s them. They all have huge grins on their faces as they stumble over to them, across the cafeteria, pushing away the last few people who was in their way.

Louis groans. “Oh, god.”

“About damn _time_ ,” Niall exclaims as soon as he reaches them, “that you got yourself some well-fitting balls, because I was starting to think you’d _never_ -”

“Does this mean that there will be days where you’re not grumpy again?” Zayn chimes in, and Louis swears he could kill them.

Liam just rolls his eyes and smiles apologetically at Harry. “Sorry, we’re just really happy for you guys.”

“Yeah, we really are, and to be honest it started to become very, very tiring to constantly watch Louis pining from afar-”

“Zayn, darling?”

“Yes, Louis dearest?”

“Shut the fuck up, please.”

Harry smiles, a hint of something insecure in his eyes, and Louis’ hand finds his, squeezing it softly.

“As long as none of you screws up and we have to deal with this again, I’m fine,” Liam said.

“I don’t think there’s a very big chance that Louis would _dare_ fucking up anything again,” Niall says, beaming at their intertwined hands.

Zayn grins widely. “ _Is he supposed to be so perfect?_ ” he quotes, looking dramatically off into the distance. “ _His eyes are too green. Shit, he’s way too beautiful. Zayn, why is he so beautiful?”_

Louis looks down at his feet, cheeks flushing red. “I need new friends.”

Harry just smiles adoringly at him, though, and Louis can’t help but do the same once he looks back at him.

“Look at those lovestruck gazes. Oh how lovely. Disgustingly cute, isn’t it?”

“Our little boy is growing up, Niall.”

“It almost brings one to tears doesn’t it?”

“Zayn and Niall, could you please just shut your mouths for two seconds?”

Liam rolls his eyes. “Whatever, really. You have our blessings. We wish you everlasting happiness, you may now kiss the bride, etcetera, etcetera.”

“Hm. Yeah. Maybe I should do that. Again,” Louis figures.

The three other boys look between each other, and Liam clears his throat. “We’ll just leave now, yeah? Let you talk some more.”

Louis and Harry just nods, watches them as they walk back to their table, where Taylor still looks personally offended and Eleanor so obviously tries not to look at them.

“So…” Harry starts, with a playful, almost child-like smirk on his lips and it really hits Louis how very _gone_ he is for this boy.

“So,” Louis says. “Does this mean you’re mine now?”

Harry giggles (I repeat, _the boy giggles_ ) lowly and nods. “Yeah. I guess I am.”


End file.
